Premananda's letters to Nellie 9

Dear Nellie,

Thanks so much for your letter. I started to write you before, but lost it. I’m glad to hear you would be able to be at Baba’s side if he comes to U.S., and I could tell he was also glad. How could he do without his Mother? He would feel lost, and we would all feel lost. I am glad you can be in OJAI and certain that Jeff will take the time to be with you often as possible. I hope he will give you a plane ride and that you will not be scared—you can always trust your life in Jeffrey’s hand. I am late writing to him, but he has been in my mind as much as if he were by my side.

Baba continues to be fairly well, but suffers the usual setbacks on days when people bring all their maya--("help my wife get pregnant," "pray that I get a job," "my son is sick," "my daughter can’t get married’)—all this crap reflects in his body. But he is much better than before. The timing of the trip is as yet uncertain. It seems now Baba had long ago promised to take Pranab with him to U.S. So Pranab gets first choice to go. I go to find out about it within a few days. If he will go, all that must be arranged.

Certainly by end of June, if it is Baba’s wish to do Guru Purnima here—before if he will consent to go. (I just do my job these days—I don’t ask questions!) I had my tooth pulled yesterday after weeks of pain and am quite relieved. I shall apply for visa extension in two weeks. Even if I don’t get it, I will stay and appeal it or something. I think all will be well in that area.

Baba was pleased to hear about your daughter’s marriage and made mental note of the date. I shall remind him of it if we are still here. The heat is getting intense here, but nothing bothers me anymore! I am happy here even when I am unhappy! I try to serve and to go deeper inside and to chase the ogres away from Baba’s door.

Write again soon and all my love to you.

Love,
Bill

P.S. Will you see Krishnamurti?