More letters from India 20
by Premananda

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April 5, 1990

Dear Arjuna,

Got your enjoyable letter of the 17th yesterday. It seems incredible that mail is so slow. I was glad to hear Carl has gotten out of the guru business, at least temporarily. It’s not just that it’s "phony," but it seems to really put the brakes on one’s own learning and development when one enters into all that. Anyway, please tell him that frogs are well and flourishing in Ramanathpur and the other parts of this area I have been to. On any night, going out to take a leak, I will see three or four sitting in the immediate area of the well, and if scout around, I see more. One also hears them at night, though not in full chorus, as this is not yet "frog season." Some live under the Kali Temple, going in and out via a drain hole under the porch. If they happen to sing while in this drain tube, it is amplified. Of course, this is no measure, here at the ashram, for Kali cares for her own here and keeps a menagerie extraordinaire. I am now convinced that here, the dogs are not dogs, the cat is not a cat, and all comings and goings are regulated by Her Mystery. Somehow 60 years of worship by Baba has worn the maya thin here so there is pouring in from the Reality, a kind of warp. Anything could be anything. But back to the frogs, they do say there are fewer frogs now, but it is because there are now "hunters" who go around catching them to sell the legs to the foreign market. The Chinese, they say, eat frogs legs. Japanese, too, no doubt. It is profitable enough to have made a dent in the population, I guess. Maybe that is partly why the mosquitoes are so horrific this year. Unbelievable. But beyond all that, the weather is truly disturbed. It is colder and more rainy for this time of year than anyone can ever remember. Even this morning one needed a jacket, and Jayo, Nayen and me have (had) colds and sniffles. The weather anomaly, of course, is a delight as far as I am concerned. I have had no heat problem yet at all. But for the farmers, it has messed things up. Yesterday I went with Modhon to his field. He wanted to take a picture of me plowing his field with his two bulls!! That was an education in itself. He showed me his onion field. The whole crop was wasted because there was too much water (rain) for this time of year. His family can eat them, but they will be too small to sell. I took pictures of the shoshan (burning place) and peepul tree where Baba did sadhana. I cannot begin to tell you all I have undergone this time. Something has happened. I was reminded of that program variable, "nudge." If I was a neural net element with one side America and the other India, then it feels this time like "nudge" has pushed this cell over to India. I feel swallowed up in it this time. I don’t have as much frustration with it as before, nor has media withdrawal or news poverty been a problem. I really don’t want to leave this time. Baba is living reality. He was THE reality, in fact, and even so was pointing beyond. Maybe it is my age, maybe my heart is getting ripe, who knows. Anyway, I want to get some money and come back and work here on this stuff. If only I can work out a way of six months/flip-flop for a few years it will be just right. October to March in India each. Three months is not enough. Oh well, all by God’s grace. There is a lot to do in America. Do you think we can find Bengali/Hindi Postscript fonts, or make them? I am bringing some alphabet books. I am also going through the reel-to-reel tapes here (cassette copies made by Jeff) and doing synopses. That will complete our first pass catalogue of all tapes. The reel-to-reel tapes are very clear in general and should be converted to DAT as soon as feasible. As I indicated before, some of the disciples here are beginning to place some value on leaving some record of Baba for the future. I hope I can get some money when I return. I am also anxious in this dimension at this time. Rabi told me: "If you have a lakh of taka in the bank, the interest is RS1000/mo., which is just enough to live on, excluding rent." Maybe I can do something with the puzzle programs. Anyway, I am leaving day after tomorrow for Dalhousie to see Vimala for four or five days. She sent me a lovely letter and invited me there. She will be there from the 9th on, and I will get there also on the 9th (two days and two nights on the train!). I have not wandered alone in India for quite a while. I am a little nervous. Vimala said in her letter: "I am glad that you are back in your Land of Love. One should live where Love dances in one’s life. The flow of Love in every movement is the fulfillment of human life. American and European civilizations have reached the peak of Reason and Science. It has peeped into the region of the Transcendental. It has yet to take a quantum jump into the DIMENSION OF LOVE and understand the MYSTERY OF DEDICATION." (Did I already send you that?) They say the hill stations are also incredibly cold for this time of year. I am trying to learn Hindi so I can go out of Bengal more easily. I played on a Casio synthesizer in Chanditala the other day! It was a good one, belonging to an uncle of a friend. I played "Hare Krishna" against rock rhythm. It is nearly time for Indian Rock ’n Roll to arise, Mantra Rock. I don’t understand, however, why in 8,000 years the Indians could not grasp harmony (or even sing in unison!!). Much more later…